Every now and then we hear or see something so simply profound, it stops us in our tracks. That's how this very personal blog was "born".
I've been pretty much of a workaholic all of my life. It started when I was a single Mom, to make ends meet...I worked two jobs. Admittedly...it was a self induced survival strategy. I wanted to prove to myself and my EX that I could support my Son on my own. I wanted NO child support, and only asked for Eric's father to cover the cost of daycare and half of any medical expenses. Dumb move as I look back, but hindsight is always 20/20.
History had showed me in my 23 years of life that any and everyone I had learned to trust personally...would indeed let me down. I was afraid to trust again. So I set out on a mission to protect my Son and myself the best way I knew how. Self sufficiency would not protect us for long however. In a divorce...where children are concerned...eventually...the parent with the most toys WINS.
Learning how NOT to be a parent 24 hours a day can leave you emotionally searching for something to wrap your heart around. Like mini bouts of empty nest syndrome. Some get hobbies, some lose their minds, some self medicate...and the rest of us? Well...we WORK!
It wasn't the life I ordered, but it became what I was good at. The mask was something I could safely wear...with no questions asked...and no explanation needed.
Fast Forward>>>>>>>>>>>>>>August 2011>>>>>>Wake Up Call!
While at a sending off party for a friend--"Sandi, I'm going to think about you often. Every time I think about you I will think of work...because you are so dedicated and you work all the time". BAM BAM BAM....shot through the heart...and NOT by CUPID either!
Yes we all have to work, but to be remembered at the end of life's journey as someone who was so dedicated and worked all of the time...is NOT the legacy I choose to leave behind.
Hearing my friend say those words was Divine Intervention as far as I'm concerned. There's a reason God puts people in our path. There is often a lesson to be learned from every interaction...life is one big lesson...and when the student is ready...the teacher will come.
This student is ready. From now on...I'm going to listen to the teachers along my way...the song I hear...the news I read...the clouds as they make shapes across the sky. Rather than spending the remainder of my life worried about surviving the storm...I'm choosing to take every chance possible to dance barefoot in the rain. Won't you join me?
I've been pretty much of a workaholic all of my life. It started when I was a single Mom, to make ends meet...I worked two jobs. Admittedly...it was a self induced survival strategy. I wanted to prove to myself and my EX that I could support my Son on my own. I wanted NO child support, and only asked for Eric's father to cover the cost of daycare and half of any medical expenses. Dumb move as I look back, but hindsight is always 20/20.
History had showed me in my 23 years of life that any and everyone I had learned to trust personally...would indeed let me down. I was afraid to trust again. So I set out on a mission to protect my Son and myself the best way I knew how. Self sufficiency would not protect us for long however. In a divorce...where children are concerned...eventually...the parent with the most toys WINS.
Learning how NOT to be a parent 24 hours a day can leave you emotionally searching for something to wrap your heart around. Like mini bouts of empty nest syndrome. Some get hobbies, some lose their minds, some self medicate...and the rest of us? Well...we WORK!
It wasn't the life I ordered, but it became what I was good at. The mask was something I could safely wear...with no questions asked...and no explanation needed.
Fast Forward>>>>>>>>>>>>>>August 2011>>>>>>Wake Up Call!
While at a sending off party for a friend--"Sandi, I'm going to think about you often. Every time I think about you I will think of work...because you are so dedicated and you work all the time". BAM BAM BAM....shot through the heart...and NOT by CUPID either!
Yes we all have to work, but to be remembered at the end of life's journey as someone who was so dedicated and worked all of the time...is NOT the legacy I choose to leave behind.
Hearing my friend say those words was Divine Intervention as far as I'm concerned. There's a reason God puts people in our path. There is often a lesson to be learned from every interaction...life is one big lesson...and when the student is ready...the teacher will come.
This student is ready. From now on...I'm going to listen to the teachers along my way...the song I hear...the news I read...the clouds as they make shapes across the sky. Rather than spending the remainder of my life worried about surviving the storm...I'm choosing to take every chance possible to dance barefoot in the rain. Won't you join me?
I like to think of myself as a bump in your work-a-holic road....we always made the most of Happy Hour and our weekends! We found ways to have fun because I was right there with you as a work-a-holic when we met and became forever friends!
ReplyDeleteAnytime you need an escape you know who to call :)